You know you've been in Indonesia too long if. . .

Good old bajaj ("bawj-eye")

Some fellow expat teachers passed this on to us, and I can't help but share. There were over 50, but I'm going to include the ones that we feel we can relate to/understand most. Here's to Indonesia!

You know you've been in Indonesia too long if. . .

• You too believe traffic lanes, stop signs and one way streets are mere suggestions and that sidewalks were meant to drive on or they wouldn't have paved them. (daily)
• You can drive 60 km/h two inches from cars on either side of you, but cannot back into a parking space in an empty lot without two guys yelling “Kiri…Kiri Terus, Terus, Terus…” (left and straight)
• You're willing to pay to use a toilet you wouldn't go to within a kilometer of at home (unfortunately very true)
• You are quite content to repeat your order six times in a restaurant that only has four items on the menu (not sure I'm content, but it happens)
• You're not surprised when three men with a ladder show up to change a light bulb (or your AC unit)
• You think it is normal to wait six days to get the water you ordered or pay 50% surcharge for same day service (unfortunately)
• Taxi drivers understand you
• You own a rice cooker (but it broke)
• When crossing a busy street you believe that a limp wrist motion with your right arm creates a force field that repels oncoming traffic (every day!)
• You think it's logical to dry your hands with Kleenex (my class will go through an entire large kleenex pack in one day - no joke, it cleans up every mess)
• There is no discount for what is clearly a demo model
• A gaggle of teenage girls swoon as you walk by (at Chris of course)
• McDonald's is out of hamburgers and KFCs is out of chicken (or the Gelato Bar is out of gelato)
• You look left, right, backwards, forwards, up and down before crossing a one way street (you never know!)
• You've seen every hollywood blockbuster three weeks before its premier (or for only $3)
• You pick your nose in public (Not yet, haha. But I sure do see it done a lot!)
• You carry tissues in your pocket for 'emergency stops' (and boy does it come in handy!)
• The titles "Mr. Bob" and "Miss Barbara" begin to sound normal to you (everything is first name basis here. I'm never gonna get used to Trammell!)
• You stop wondering why the concept of turning lanes never occurred to traffic engineers in Jakarta 
• You stop wondering if the concept of traffic engineers ever occurred to anyone in Jakarta (TIJ)
• You are no longer confused when you are asked if you want some 'beep bacon' (beef bacon) with your eggs.
• You say "handphone" not "cellphone" (and blackberries are more popular than iphones)
• You eat fried rice in the morning
• Your local McDonald's serves rice and sambal (and spaghetti)
• You have ever successfully bribed a police officer (thankfully we haven't had to)
• You have ever legally bought pirated software or VCDs. 
• You know exactly how many islands Indonesia has (18,306 - last I heard)
• You have used a mosquito repellent that looks like a coil and is lit on one end (worked well in Kalimantan)
• You have ever ridden in a motor vehicle with three wheels (Bajaj)
• You are no longer startled when you see a 12-year old driving a motorbike while smoking (sad, but true. . . or a family of 5 on one motorcycle)
• and if ... YOU UNDERSTAND ALL OF THE ABOVE REFERENCES!

*just for fun :)