December 1st: {{Ok family. This is one of the hardest messages I have ever had to
write. I am sorry if your hearts sunk when you read that like mine kind of did
typing it. However, after agonizing months of prayer, despite all odds, we feel
that God is calling us back for one more year. I don't really understand it. It
is the difficult struggle of leaving everything we love at home to complete a
task that we feel is not yet completed. We have such an amazing gift in all of
you. I hate the fact that another year will go by where we will not be able to
deepen our relationships and make more awesome memories. Yet, I still feel like
this is where God wants us. Don't get me wrong, we are blessed here and I know
that God has put students into our lives for a reason this year . . . and for
reasons I can't foresee He is telling me that there is more that needs to be
done. I wish I was being called back home and felt that clear leading to where
my selfish heart wants to be, but that is just not the case. I am scared. I am
scared that when we come home that time will have slipped away. That things
will be too different, that people will be different places. That Thursday
night basketball won't happen. That Josh or Justin will have moved away, that
we would not be able to play Saturday football anymore. That we would not be
able to have ________________. I don't like it. You guys know me. I don't like
change and feel so blessed to have had you all so close all my life. I honestly
feel that God still has that for us, or at least I pray that way. The point is,
I love you guys, we love you guys, but we love God more. I never fully
understood Luke 14:26-33 until now.
26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate
father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own
life—such a person cannot be my disciple. 27 And whoever does not carry their
cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.
28 “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower.
Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money
to complete it? 29 For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it,
everyone who sees it will ridicule you, 30 saying, ‘This person began to build
and wasn’t able to finish.’
31 “Or suppose a king is about to go to war
against another king. Won’t he first sit down and consider whether he is able
with ten thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty
thousand? 32 If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is
still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. 33 In the same way, those
of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples."
We feel like we'd be hypocrites if we ran home
now. So, that being said, we have two extra weeks this Summer and will make the
most of that time! I love working here, and love coaching and the kids, but I
love you guys much more. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I didn't know
how I was going to get it out so I just started writing. Love you guys and
thanks for the unending prayer and support. }}
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Chris
wrote that to his family as we were making our decision to leave Indonesia after this year, or re-sign our contracts. And
this post has been in draft form since then. For some reason I just couldn't
round up the words to finish it off. Coming back to it now, I'm kind of glad I
didn't. Looking back at our decision, and how torn we were, I can now say that
our hearts have been so calmed since then! My favorite verse proves to be true
time and time again:
Philippians 4:6-7
6 Do not be anxious
about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with
thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And
the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Every
time.
It's
barely been three months since then. Chris is still working his buns off, we
miss our families like crazy, we long for June 14th when we can hop on a plane
home. BUT, we are contently living where God has placed us, and He is blessing
us. We're loving our church. New opportunities are arising for us to
serve. New friendships are blossoming. New student ministries are
forming. God is good, and we're seeing those things that He still has for us
here. The things we felt, but couldn't see, are now being revealed. There's no
better place to be, than in the middle of His will for our lives.
Thank
you to those of you have been prayerfully supporting us. When I talk to my
grandma and she reminds me that she prays for Chris and I everyday, I am
overwhelmed with love. And I know she's not the only one. So thank you. God has
put us into the best families ever, and surrounded us by the best friends we
could ask for. Thanks for supporting us no matter where we are.
And since no blog post is complete without pictures, I did a little random recap. It's crazy looking back at how time has flown by!
